I mentioned in my New Year’s post that I had recently made a business decision that was difficult for me. In the last quarter of 2014 (because I’m an adult now and say stuff like that), I decided to stop selling Stark at wholesale to other shops and to be available exclusively on our own site. It was in some ways painful, because I had made some great business connections with women I had come to see as my friends. Maybe with a pen-pal kind of vibe with a whole lot of entrepreneurial talk, but I truly enjoyed these relationships. Not to mention, it was a sizeable chunk of my income and brand exposure.
But, wholesale never felt right to me. Right from the get-go in early 2012, I was always dragging my heals around it. It was something I felt that a company in this field “had” to do. I knew my heart just wasn’t into it though. I liked the chase, but then I felt very meh and unexcited, even if I truly adored the shop. I know I never acted whole-hearted about this side of my business, because if I had been, I would have really rocked some major gym socks right off. (Any time you do work your entire being is 136% dedicated to, you deliver mind-blowing results, and I don’t care who you are, your education or talents. This is fact.) And then there was also the question of how much additional work, coordination, time and physical space it took up. By the way, I need to give you a tour of my studio, because it’s shockingly TINY. This is why I don’t do my own shipping…I physical can’t sustain all the boxes and tape and labels and whatnot. I run a tiny, tight ship here that’s just big enough for my manufacturing and creative work, and the nitty gritty of handling bulk orders was a total pain.
That’s right. I said it. Here’s how I screwed up 2014, what I learned (the hard way), and how I’m going to own 2015 (and how you can too!).
In 2014, I had one simple New Year’s “un-resolution”: to have no goals but to do the things that make me happy. This was my un-resolution method: no “gym x times per week” or “make x dollars” nonsense. I was getting right to the heart of it: just be happier. Easy peasy!
I was in pursuit of happiness, and little did I know, I was wasting my time. I failed, majorly. And, in some perverse, masochistic way, actually ended up being anxious and depressed for most of the year. I didn’t realize what a huge disservice to myself I was doing when I just said I wanted to be happier. It was major sabotage and my wishy washy resolution was screwing me over. By the summer, I knew I had some major work to do and began to undo and fix my well-meaning, but ultimately stupid happiness goal.
I have to admit I’m feeling guilty about something.
I had promised a story last weekend (via newsletter…you are signed up, right?) and I didn’t deliver. Here’s why: I was super burnt out. From the sale, from some recent changes made to Stark (yet to be announced!!), and because I was busy getting rid of 9/10ths of my possessions.
Yup. You read that right.
But here’s the thing: I didn’t just clean out my garage or attic (don’t have either one of those); I got rid of 9/10ths of my personal belongings. Stuff like clothes that were perfectly good, but I never, ever wore. Stuff like random accessories and things I’d be hanging onto for years and didn’t really know why. I even got rid of “memorabilia” that just no longer sparked any joy in me. Oh, and over 70 books that we will never re-read (and yet we still have what feels like a full library…in fact